It was the first Christmas I was in charge of in my own home and it went exactly the way I had planned:
Perfectly coordinated presents? Check.
Homemade goodies that everyone loved? Check.
Classic Christmas songs playing on our record player? Check.
Playing with my kids, cuddling with my husband by the tree, or taking that much needed nap- you know- all the important stuff? Fail.
I sat by my twinkle lights late that Christmas night and wondered where I had gone wrong. Why had I done all the things that were expected of me but totally bailed on the moments I cherished most? Sure, it was great to have all my wrapping paper themed and matching my Christmas tree, but my kids didn’t even notice as they tore through it in seconds. All the hours spent in the kitchen resulted in delicious treats, but those hours invested were gobbled up in a fraction of the time. And that husband of mine? We hadn’t even spent quality time together. We were too busy picking up mounds of styrofoam casings and finding batteries for all the treasures littered on our living room floor.
My Christmas looked the way it should, so why didn’t it feel the way it should?
I had stood alone down the hallway while my kids giggled and laughed in celebration in their rooms and realized I had missed it, the most important parts of Christmas.
I made a promise then and there: To craft a Christmas catered to my OWN family. Not what my parents expect from me. Not what Pinterest tells me. Not even what my own perfectionist qualities bring out in me. No- I would do right by the Willis family, and everything else would have to come in second.
What would a Christmas “just for us” look like? I had never thought about it! Then the thoughts poured in…
My kids are still young and do not appreciate a five-course Christmas dinner. They couldn’t care less if we ate prime rib or hotdogs to celebrate baby Jesus. What do they care about? My attention. My
Un.
Divided.
Attention.
So I traded cooking for coloring books and baking for building Legos.
And because my kids are still young, they wake up earlier than should be legally allowed. A nap is a requirement for each family member to still be jolly by evening. So I traded my zombie exhaustion for some afternoon zzz’s.
We cut back on presents because my kids were overwhelmed by the number they typically received.
We chose to not leave the house for any other event until early evening so we wouldn’t have to rush out the door.
I even considered purchasing our breakfast from a store Christmas Eve so I wouldn’t have to “get to work” the minute everyone was hungry. A STORE BOUGHT BREAKFAST? WHO HAD I BECOME?! I’ll tell you who:
I had finally become the mom and wife my family needed me to be on Christmas. I want that for you, too. My heart is that this holiday season will look different for you than it has in the past, kids or no kids, single or married. That’s why I am offering a FREE five-day video series, sharing all my tips and tricks to survive Christmas.
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Cheers to a Happy Holiday season!
Love this. I try not to go for overkill myself. I always wake up before they do Christmas morning, I get the coffee ready and once they are all awake, I pour my husband and I a cup and we sit back and watch the chaos. We now make it a point to stop and enjoy what is happening.
Coffee is a MUST for Christmas morning! HA! I hated waiting to open presents as a kid, until my mom had a pot of coffee brewed. Now? I TOTALLY get it 😉
It is so hard for me to let go of my numerous traditions in order to make life better for all involved! I had to let go of a Christmas tree this year, and although I thought I had let go, I have to keep letting it go!
Yeah- it certainly isn’t easy every time! You will find out quickly what is important to you and what is easier to release. Keep at it, girl!
What a great post and such important perspective! I too have been slowly peeling back my expectations and to do list for the Holidays the past few years and it really reminds me what is most important! Thank you!
It makes such a huge difference, doesn’t it? Less IS more 🙂
Trying to get my inLaws to be on board with less is more. They aren’t believers and so it will take prayer, time, and speaking truth for them to understand giving of things aren’t what make Christmas. This year they gave so much I sat in the hall and cried because it was so overwhelming as I put it away. Thank you for sharing your heart.
I’m so sorry it was an overwhelming experience for you! Keep praying and giving it to God. He knows your heart and will give you the words as you speak to family and your children.